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SAVVY
SELLING - APRIL
21, 2006
Lose
Customers the Easy Way
By Michelle Nichols
EXECUTIVE
OVERVIEW
A funny sales adaptation of
"How to Lose a Guy in 10
Days" to remind you how
easy it is to lose your best
customers.
Want to keep ahead
of the competition? Read this
story, then do the opposite
at every juncture
Sometimes it's helpful to scare
yourself by imagining the unthinkable
-- blowing it and losing out
to the competition -- to keep
you on track and push you to
find new ways to keep your best
customers happy. Never forget,
your best customer is also your
competitors' best prospective
customer.
If you haven't already seen
the movie How to Lose a
Guy in 10 Days, imagine
the plot. Yep, it's pretty much
what you thought. Now compress
10 days into one workday and
drop yourself into the following
mental exercise:
You oversleep by half an hour.
Darn, it's only Tuesday. You
still have at least two days
to work this week. You're also
hung over from drinking shots
with the guys last night into
the wee hours. Since you don't
have time for a shower, you
just pull on yesterday's clothes
and sprinkle water on your hair
so it looks like you've just
taken a shower.
You notice a coffee stain on
your lapel but don't have time
to change. You splash on some
cologne, swallow a bit of toothpaste
(so folks will think you brushed
your teeth), and head out the
door.
SMOOTH OPERATOR. You open the
door of your dirty car and push
aside the wrappers from your
last few visits to fast-food
restaurants. You try to open
the passenger window to air
out the stink until you remember
that it's been stuck closed
for several months.
You head to the office of your
best customer, Brian. Your car
is low on gas, but luckily,
you just make it. You're not
so lucky when you walk through
the door. Brian's secretary
reminds you that you're 10 minutes
late for your weekly meeting.
Then you remember that this
is the week you had promised
to bring him the new pricing
sheets so you could discuss
his order for the upcoming six
months.
You had planned to swing by
your office to pick them up,
but it slipped your mind. So
you ask Brian's secretary for
her fax number and then call
your office administrator and
beg him to fax the sheets over.
You decide to flirt with the
secretary to smooth the way.
"My, you sure look nice
today. We ought to go out for
a night on the town sometime.
I bet we would have a really
fun time," you say.
CUSS WORDS. You quickly learn
she's devoutly religious and
highly offended. She tells you
her fax machine is tied up and
gives you the number for a machine
on the far side of the building.
You later find out it's low
on toner and prints one page
every two minutes.
You don't fare much better
with your own administrator.
He found out that you didn't
contribute to his holiday bonus
fund last year, and he's still
miffed. He tells you he's really
busy and he'll fax the sheets
just as soon as he can.
You call your sales manager
for support and learn that the
pricing sheets that used to
be two pages are now 10 pages,
printed front and back on heavy,
high-gloss paper. The sheets
will have to be cut before they
can be fed into the fax machine.
You throw a tantrum with your
manager, completewith cuss words
and threats of quitting.
VIOLENT IMPULSES. He hangs
up on you before you even hit
full storm. You realize Brian's
secretary is standing right
behind you, waiting to tell
you that Brian can only see
you for 10 minutes today --
and that was six minutes ago.
You run to his office, without
the new pricing sheets. When
you step through his door, you
see a thick, great-looking proposal
on his desk from your major
competitor. You've been his
sole supplier for four years.
Your pricing sheets still haven't
arrived. Without thinking, you
say, "How about that football
game last Sunday? Our team really
murdered them!" Then you
remember Brian hates all organized
sports because he spends his
free time promoting nonviolent
solutions to achieving peace
on Earth. You spend three minutes
digging yourself out of that
ditch.
Panic sets in. You point to
your competitor's sales literature
and say, snarling, "What's
that piece of trash doing on
your desk?" Since Brian
has to leave for his next meeting,
he smiles serenely and says,
"Oh, you know."
TANTRUM TWO. When he asks you
about your promised pricing
lists, you stammer and clear
your throat. "I know I
promised them to you at our
last meeting, Brian, and this
time I really tried. But our
printer was running behind again,
and then someone forgot to give
me your sheets. I'll bring them
next week, I promise."
As you slink out his door,
his secretary cheerfully tells
you that your fax has arrived.
Maybe you can leave it in Brian's
inbox. When you finally locate
the fax, that idea fades because
you realize the pages are smudgy
and that page two, with the
summary of key benefits, is
missing. As you pass his secretary
on the way out the building,
you're in the throes of a second
tantrum.
Since you skipped breakfast,
you head to lunch early. Your
car runs out of gas on the way
to the restaurant. You walk
a mile to the gas station and
spend $25 for a gas can.
JUST REWARDS. In the parking
lot of the restaurant, you meet
someone who's starting a new
business that could use a lot
of what you sell. Unfortunately,
you don't have any business
cards on you.
You find an old napkin in your
car and write your information
on it. When you hand it to her,
she hesitates before taking
it. You're confident she'll
buy a lot from you so you celebrate
by taking off the rest of the
day.
Recognize yourself in this
story? I hope you don't. But
perhaps it made you think how
you could strengthen your relationships
with your customers. Happy selling!
Michelle Nichols is a
professional sales speaker and
consultant based in Reno, Nevada.
She welcomes your questions
and comments. You can visit
her web site at www.savvyselling.com
or contact her at michelle.nichols@savvyselling.com.
Her toll-free number is (877)
352-9684.
Copyright 2000-2006. All rights
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